How to Work with Projection: The Enemy Within Exercise
A writing exercise to help you recognize projection, work with shadow parts, and deepen emotional sobriety through self-inquiry.
This exercise is adapted from âThe Paranoid Style in Our Current Politicsâ post. Read the full post for deeper context on projection, paranoia, and emotional sobriety.
This is a writing exercise to help explore your projections and deepen your emotional sobriety. This practice blends reflective journaling, parts work (IFS-style), and practical self-inquiry.
What this exercise supports:
Recognizing and working with projection
Shadow work and parts work integration
Emotional sobriety through self-awareness
Relational sobriety through understanding projection in relationships
Reducing black-and-white thinking about others
Step-by-Step Guide to Working with Projection
Time: 15 Minutes
Before you begin, find a quiet and comfortable place where you wonât be disturbed. Take a few deep breaths to settle your mind and body, allowing yourself to become present.
You might find some of these grounding exercises helpful.
When you feel ready, open your journal or writing tool and begin the exercise with honesty and curiosity.
Step 1: Name the Person or Group That Triggers Strong Feelings
Name someone or a group that evokes strong negative feelings.
What exactly bothers you about them?
When did I first notice these strong feelings toward this person or group?
In what situations do these feelings become most intense?
How do I typically react (internally or externally) when I encounter them?
Step 2: Write About the Traits You See in Your âEnemyâ
Write 2â3 sentences capturing what you see as their core traits, beliefs, or behaviours.
What do they represent to you?
How do I feel when I imagine being around them or interacting with them?
Are there specific actions or words from them that stand out to me as especially significant or upsetting?
Step 3: Notice If Any of These Traits Exist Within You
Ask yourself:
Do any of these traits exist in me, even subtly?
Have I ever suppressed or rejected this quality in myself?
Could this trait reflect something I secretly admire or fear?
Write a few lines honestly exploring your answers.
Step 4: Connect with the Part of You Thatâs Triggered
Identify the part of you thatâs triggered. Ask:
What is it protecting me from?
How old does it feel?
What does it need right now?
Write a kind and caring note to that part of yourself.
Reassure this part that youâll protect it and manage things with emotional maturity, without casting anyone as the villain.
Step 5: What to Do With Your Writing
Once youâve completed the exercise, you have several options for what to do next with your writing. You may want to:
Keep your writing to review later. You may wish to revisit, refine, or expand certain sections, or continue writing to the same person, emotion, or part of yourself in a future session.
Destroy it. If it feels right for you, you can burn, tear up, or delete your writing as a symbolic act of release.
Share it. Consider sharing your exercise with a trusted friend or mental health professional. Allowing someone to bear witness to your experiences can deepen the therapeutic impact. The practice of sharing also echoes Step 5 of the 12 Steps, which involves admitting to ourselves and another human being the exact nature of our struggles and wounds.
Why Working with Projection Supports Emotional Sobriety
The Importance of Working with Projection
Projection is the opposite of emotional sobriety. When we project parts of ourselves (idealized or despised) onto others, we make others responsible for our inner world. Emotionally sober people recognize these projections and own whatâs happening inside them.
Maintaining Healthy Boundaries and Self-Compassion in Projection Work
Showing compassion for an âenemyâ doesnât mean you have to let them harm you. Use mature discernment, guided by your own values, to decide what respectful behaviour looks like for you. Protecting yourself and maintaining strong boundaries is essential. Loving and having compassion for all includes extending that same care to yourself. Sometimes, offering yourself safety and security as an act of loving self-care must take precedence over allowing someone who is acting out to remain close to you.
You may also find it helpful to try this letter-writing exercise for working through difficult feelings toward someone.
If this exercise helped you, consider sharing it with someone who might benefit.
Subscribe to Sober 2nd Thought to receive new posts, exercises, meditations, and reflections on emotional sobriety, noetic clarity, and relational integrity. Explore the resources page for more therapeutic writing exercises and guided meditations, or browse the archive for past posts.